SAD - It's A Disease, Look It Up...
So just so you know, I'm in a foul mood today... And I really shouldn't be:
The Yankees just swept to get into the ALCS vs. the Angels, who swept Boston after a two-out meltdown by DB-du jour Jonathon Papelbon...
The Kumquats are champions again after an undefeated season...
I'm kicking pnemonia's A#@ after a sub-2:00 half marathon last weekend...
I have great family, friends, etc and everyone seems to be doing great...
But there are a few things that are contributing to the crap-osity that is the current:
I struggled (and I mean STRUGGLED) through a 14-mile long, slow distance training run on Sunday after I did a great run last weekend at the San Jose Half Marathon... (sidenote: I was moody after the run yesterday, and I tried my best to snap out of it, but it just wasn't happening... Usually I'm tempermental after a long run - you exhaust so much physical and emotional energy that you never quite know what's going to happen to your mood... For instance, after San Jose I was in a great mood, yesterday I was in a crap-tastic mood... there's really no telling what's going to happen afterward...)
After I got to bed early yesterday in preparation for today (Monday... seriously...) I woke up and it was dark outside...
Also, today is overcast with a high in the low 60's and tomorrow it's going to start dumping water left over from a typhoon in the Pacific. Which basically means the death of sunshine for the next four months... Great...
So basically I'm reading the signs, and the point of fact is that my Seasonal Affective Disorder is soon to be in full swing...
By the way, this is what you get when you type "Seasonal Affective Disorder" into a google images search engine:
Now, I like to think that I'm a pretty easy-going, happy-go-lucky kinda guy... Even when things go wrong, I can usually roll with it... Nineteen days out of twenty, I take on the day in the best of spirits, bright and chipper, ready to meet whatever challenges lie ahead with a positive attitude... But not during the SAD months...
So in the spirit of the season, I'm just going to bitch about some random crap that pisses me off...
We'll kick this off with people (can I call them people? for the time being, in any of the rest of this entry, when you see "people" please replace in your mind with "retard" or "DB" or "mouth breather" or "person who thinks Rob Schneider is funny") who use the phrase "usually always" as in:
"I don't know why he's late, my brother is usually always on time."
Let me explain something here, Mr. Hemingway, the words "usually" and "always" have two completely different meanings and one cannot modify the other... Maybe I'm not exactly J.D. Salinger myself, but come on, either your brother is "usually" on time or he is "always" on time... He can't be both.
"Sometimes my sister is never happy."
"Most of the time he always never pays back his loans." AAAAAAARGHHHH
And while we're on the subject of language, I could enthusiastically disembowel those mindless twits who use the word "literally" when they mean the opposite:
"I ate so much last night that I literally exploded." Is that right? You literally EXPLODED? Wow, I bet the rest of the folks at the Hometown Buffet were aghast, what, with being caught in the resulting barrage of bodily shrapnel and all...
No, you FIGURATIVELY exploded... It's a metaphor, and you're a dumbass... Literally.
Same goes for anyone who says they "could care less." Again, that's the opposite of what they mean. I'm going to go slow on this one, so bear with me. Okay, suppose someone tells you that Pete from down the block thinks you're a retard...
Same goes for anyone who says they "could care less." Again, that's the opposite of what they mean. I'm going to go slow on this one, so bear with me. Okay, suppose someone tells you that Pete from down the block thinks you're a retard...
Since Pete himself is a royal DB, his opinion doesn't mean anything... So you don't care at all, AKA you care nothing, zero, nada, zilch, then you COULDN'T care less... You could not care less than nothing, zero, etc... IT'S A MATHEMATICAL IMPERATIVE!
If you "COULD care less," That would mean you would have to care, to at least some degree, that Pete thinks you're a retard, which we've already determined that you don't... But then again, "Math is hard," isn't it, Kevin??
Anyway, there's a ton more but whatever... I don't like this the way that I are right now... But I'm starting to feel better... this is better than therapy...
Excuse the above, I'm usually always in a better frame of mind...
6 comments:
Sorry you are sad Andy. Your rant made me laugh. :)
Haha!I'm sorry you're in a foul mood, but I do appreciate the laughs.
It might not be the weather, or it could be the weather and post race blues...EEK!
http://www.runtheplanet.com/trainingracing/marathon/recovery.asp
There is a quote that I think of often when I'm SAD here in Utah...
Winter is nature's way of saying, "Up yours." ~Robert Byrne
T - well that's the point, but this is the only bad week... we call it "transition week"
L - I'll be fine... and glad I could make you laugh...
A - yeah, a combination of stuff equals bad news...
H - I love that quote... I fully subscribe to it, the only good thing to happen in winer is the snowboarding
Call my a DB if you want but I'm glad you were sad. Not only do I love a good rant but I also love finding ways to group people I hate together.
Oh and the snow will fall soon then good time will be had by all.
Post a Comment