Three Random Third Day Of The Week Thoughts

So, I hurt myself - I think that's been made clear by my injury list to the right... It's not that I'm clumsy (ok, sometimes it is) it's just that I tend to do activities that lend themselves to my getting hurt... and that's not likely to change...

At any rate, have you ever been startled and distracted simultaneously, so that your brain gets jumbled up with the wrong exclamation?? The other day I was putting together some of my recent race numbers in frames to hang on the wall, and I was using glue to keep them down because at the end of a race they're completely wrinkled... Well, forgetting that I had already glued one side of the thing, I reached out for it and my fingers immediately stuck to it like it was flypaper... If you don't know what that feels like, ask Matt...

Anyway, I wasn't expecting this, but I also wasn't fully paying attention because I was still concentrating on smoothing the thing out and, let's face it, I have a little bit of adult-onset ADD... The result of all this confusion was that I inexplicably shouted, "OW!" for no apparent reason... Thankfully no one was around, so I didn't have to explain that I was too retarded to know the difference between sticky and hurty...

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You know what I hate?? Air blowers that they have in restrooms instead of paper towel dispensers... I don;t know anyone who DOESN'T hate them, (except for the tree-huggers and really: are they even people??) And the thing is, the manufacturer knows that people hate them... That's why they find the need to label them to justify their existence: "These damn things save natural resources and are more sanitary than paper towels, blah blah blah..." 

You know what also saves natural resources and is more sanitary than paper towels? A big sign that says "Please wipe your hands on your pants because we're too f---ing cheap to buy paper towels..." (And don't get me started on the thin-A&*, chicken-Sh#$ little toilet paper they have...) 

Also, do you think motion-activated paper towel dispensers (the hi-tech environmentalists dream...) work for vampires? I hope so, because otherwise there are probably a lot of vampires out there who aren't washing their hands after using the bathroom... On the other hand, maybe that's why they wear capes...

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I don't understand the system we use for deciding what foreigners are supposed to be called... Why do we have Australians, Italians and Brazilians, but not Japanians, Mexiconians or Portugalians?? 

And if Australians are from Australia, why aren't Canadians from Canadia? People from Canada should be called Canadanians... And why aren't people from Germany called Germaniums?? I mean, I know it doesn't make any sense, but it would be funny... and really, don't the Germaniums owe us that much?